New Year Resolution

OMG... 2008 is almost over..wow.. soo fast... let start on my 2009 resolution that I probably won't do...
1) Own all 5 seasons of Boston Legal... my new favorite show ever....
2) Work out and get buff... hahahha..we'll see
3) Able to run 5 miles for fun....
4) Be more organize, my room especially
5) Wash and clean my car more than 3 times a year.
6) Be less of a jerk...
7) Study more spread out, less all nighter, preferably every Monday and Wednesday from 5-7.
8) Skip less class
9) Go on less dinner date, cost too much money and I don't continue to talk to half of the girls.
10) Save money, less on investment/gambling, just save on bank account.
11) Pray more
12) Listen to more different style of music
13) Get a dancing lesson
14) Form a football team to compete in Rice Bowl next year
15) Less small talk, more serious conversation
16) Travel, either Las Vegas or New York
17) Learn to swim better
18) Gain 20 lbs
19) Be a better person, to family and friends
20) Able to do at least 5 resolutions this year....

Disapointing Dallas

Well, season is over for the cowboy, such a drama filled season and it end as badly as one would imagine.. sigh
Choir Christmas party was fun, we joke around and have a lot of small talk, got to see old/new friend, watch football and music together.. my teacher do his fortune telling and I got my fortune. For love, nonexistence, which i got to admit it soo true... for academic, well, it doesn't look well either, 2 professors will give me problem next semester, i guess Minter will be one of them.. hahahah, and i don't usually believe in fortune telling. ^__^

DAllas COwboy

Just when I thought they can't disappoint me anymore, they find a way to do it... first the offense suck... then when the offense finally get it together... the defense... the BIG D... they been consistent all year.. they used to gather the mess that the offense and romo created.. FAIL me.. not once but TWICE... 140+ rushing yards. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..... =(

Waking Up Early to Study

sitting here, 1.5 hour till my final... been awake since 3.. i realize something.. I don't hate school as much as I thought.. I mean all this sleep derivation is horrible.. but it give me a reason to wake up.. sometime a guy need a reason to get up in the morning... fear and hope has been dominated my entire life.. fear that i'll be late to school or wherever, hope that something better will enter my life... today.. well.. school and final.. odd feeling but different.. i have no fear since i study and know the material.. i'm not hopeful because today will be like any other day.. I just wake up and think about school.. that it..

And while up, I'm planning a 2-Day-after Christmas BBQ & karaoke Get Together...i miss my friends so why not do a party?? 2 day after christmas will be friday.. Meaning most people have plenty of time w/ family, and it a Friday.. I could plan activities.. yay...

Winter Come Early

Yesterday was warm, last night was cold, this morning was colder, and now... well.. it freezing. I love Texas weather... ^__^

lil update in my life...

It official... I can't play soccer anytime soon, I injured myself twice at the exact same spot, once in the rain, other in a windy day... SO yea, all i can do now is walk and pass the ball... =(

I love church music especially Christmas music, it sooo peaceful, calming, and really meaningful. I can recite most of the song in my head and often sing it when I was driving, give me peace and joy in one of the greatest season of the year.

Ochem finals.... one word.. wow.. it was really difficult....very detail, very long, and very difficult... It got to be one of the hardest exam I taken in years.. But at least it over.

Christmas play... I hate finding people for the parts.. I got some kids that BEG me for the part, other I personally ask and reject me because they think they are too coool... well, next time, I'll stop asking and start let kids sign up, and do the play base on amount of people sign up, save me the work.... For all those kids who have such high spirit, I LOVE you guys, you guys is the future of our church.. and I'll do anything in my power to get you guys the part in our church Christmas play.. I mean I direct a 5 min skit and so far, I got 35 students.. Don't worry about it, i'll get you guys a part.

Seating here writing a blog and recall my past experience, it hit me... I haven't got a real conversation with anyone for a long time. I guess the most recent conversation I have is with Kristen about religion and Anh about drinking stuff... and that only lasted 20-35 min or so... I haven't got a real conversation with any guy since MO in august. I like to talk but what happen to me?????? At TCU, I got my usual group of guys, Peter Don, Zack, and Brian... but we never have a real conversation.. just small talk.. same thing happen with my friend in ROTC, we also have small talk.. nothing major... and at church.. same thing.... I begin to notice that I began to talk less and less everyday... I specifically talk about guy because they are the one I usually talk to the most.. more things in common.. For girls that aren't my friends, our convo last 15 min or so, until I found something about her that i found unattractive... for girls that I know for a long time.. well, hi and bye, checking in on their life once in a while... for girls that I know and I meet daily... all we talk about is TV and school.. things I use to love to talk about doesn't play as big of a role in my life right now. Is it possible that I'm a introvert this whole time but wear a mask as a extrovert but still secretly a introvert?? hmmmmm

Christmas present,this year I decide not to celebrate Christmas as a consumerism but as a humbug. Beside, why spent so much time/money on Christmas present when you shouldn't have.. I'm going to get my parent, brother, and sister something because they're family, for everyone else.. I give "merry Christmas" handshake to the guys and hug for the girls.

I realize I haven't grown up yet, I still think responsibility is a bitch.. i hate to be responsible... I like to live freely and do everything on my own term.. but I also realize that I don't live in my own universe.. there thing that needed to be done and someone need to be responsible for it.. hope I can step up into the plate..

I got a 87 on my homosexual paper... start out strong but end up too opinionated.. but seriously.. who can really rationally defense moral.. especially in this time and age... everyone so "liberal" and "open", think about people "right" and "equality", sigh.... I don't know.. kids are soo screw up this day that I suddenly don't care anymore. if you don't want kids, don't be irresponsible and have sex, and if you think sex is the most important thing in your life, well, I think you need a new life.. and about people choice and right, well, some right must be restricted for the good of the whole.. if you part of that small minority.. tough luck and find something else to be passionate about..
"Passionate people are one step above stupid people"
Passion cloud rational... plain and simple

that it for now... back to study ^__^

My Life

I want to live a carefree life, with ton of laugh,
To be able to roam the big wide world to discover the beauty of nature.

I once sat near the great Sea, just contemplated about life
As the endless tides rolling into the shore,
It seem as the Sea is laughing at me
For all the tides, whether sinking, floating, or drifting with the current,
All that is remembered, all that is known,
Like my memories and my past,
All will disappear into nothingness after it reach the shore
What matter, if any, is the present, here, and now
Where a small part of the great Sea cause a minor disturbance
To set it aside thus render it significant.

Staring into the great purple sunset I imagined Heaven,
Wonder what they think when looking down
at all the chaos, madness and quarrel in the world,
When the great war was fought
Who shall be vanquished and who the victorious?

Death end all, for those who care and don’t

Driving up into the lofty mountain in the morning
Staring down at the endless river travel across the rice field
I feel far removed from the worlds of passion and tears,
For human emotion is so diminutive in the grand scale of nature.
With a gentle morning breeze, I then lost in quiet solitude
Bygone camaraderie bequeaths a tinge of melancholy

Chivalry gallantry and true friendship that shine,

With the first ray of light in these dark beginning of day.

Sniggering at my wasted life, afloat in the sea of loneliness;
I only to have my cynicism to redeem sanity.

sigh...... x___x